Trying Harder

Well, isn't this blog turning into all kinds of ridiculous? I'm not sure when the last time was that I got this sporadic about my writing.

Christmas, and New Year's, and visiting all kinds of family, and Jackson's first Christmas concert (How in the world is my baby old enough to be performing in school concerts?), and baking, and returning to school, and trying to keep my house sort of clean, and looking for writing work have all kept me a little busy.

Plus, you know, I've been trying to make dinner for my family again--that got a little sketchy for awhile there, too.

I've spent so much time this week frustrated. The linen closet was driving me nuts, and under the bathroom counter was a madhouse, and all kinds of too-small baby hats and socks and bibs were mushrooming out of Matthias's closet. I bought some plastic storage tubs and sorted all those things out, and then when I saw the junk heap we pretend is Jackson's dresser, I lost the will to do much more than take an arm and sweep all his crap into another tub. Hey, it looks better, and I'll pitch his treasures when he's not looking later.

I've also started crocheting an afghan. --like I have time to do that. But my yarn tub is making me a little loony, so I'm taking every random piece of yarn I can and seeing just how well purple, pink, maroon, fuzzy blue, and neon orange and green go together. For some reason, I've always wanted to make an ugly blanket, just to see if irony will strike and it actually comes out looking okay. So far, I'm not sure, but creating is really fun.

Yesterday, as I was starting to despair about all the work I'd done on, well, everything really, and how few results were readily visible, I contemplated hurling myself of Dirty Dishes cliff. Then I realized something: I've been trying harder lately. Meals are improving. I'm creating a big blanket that will either be beautiful or pulled out only when it's dark. I'm getting many small projects done and eliminating things that are annoying me. This week, Jackson finally reached a big goal of being able to identify all 50 states on the map--fifty!--and I saw where out school efforts are paying off. Plus, I'm really getting a lot done with my church responsibilities.

I'm trying harder, and the results are coming slowly but surely. I'll keep plugging away and remember that the effort is certainly worth something.